Episode 1 - The Teachings According to 360
Hi, I’m Emma (aka Mrs Teeps) and I am an Xbox 360 widow. Since that little black box (i own an elite - Tps) entered my house I have learned several things and Teeps thought I should share them with you and so every month or so I will chose a topic and give you my thoughts. Feel free to suggest topics for me to cover, I will happily talk about Americans and why they are lovely people really, small children and the X-Box or even the fact that Westy looks a lot like Penfold. So sit back and enjoy, or scroll past this whole bit because seriously what could a girl say about XBox that could be useful?
So apart from learning my husband is a really bad loser and unbelievably competitive what has the X-Box ever done for me? Well apart from the late night occasions where I’m woken by cries of ‘FUCK!! FUCK!! WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING WESTY?’ and the constant feeing that I’m listening into somebody elses phone conversation I have learned several things since that little black box entered my house.
The first is that it doesn’t matter that our TV has a split screen mode which would allow me to watch CSI whilst Teeps plays, it would be stupid and inconsiderate for me to ask my game addict husband to sacrifice even the smallest amount of the 32” inch screen. This means I have to REALLY want to watch something and has resulted in me NOT watching Big Brother, X factor, I’m a Celebrity or any other reality TV which possibly won’t be repeated should I miss an episode. So the Xbox has cured me of reality TV.
The second thing I have learnt since the 360 appeared under our telly is that Microsoft are clever bastards. Not only do they come up with games people feel or think they want but Xbox live means that if you want to socialise with your virtual mates then you not only WANT to buy the latest games but you HAVE to buy them or risk being a social pariah.
I have also learned NEVER TALK TO SOMEONE WEARING A HEADSET! The reason is simply because he’s not listening. He is either concentrating on killing people, coming up with some witty insult like "i'd rather eat my own face than play with you again" or is more interested in what his team is up to.
Lastly for this blog I have learned that my husband tells stupid lies like ‘I live in Texas’ and he can’t do any accent other than a Bolton one. In fact I don’t like him very much when he plays. He’s a bad bad man. (she doesn't mean that...she loves me...loves me lots! - tps)
These are all observations from watching my other half over the top of my ds. In my next offering I will be writing about tea-break and toilet etiquette as observed by the non-gamer.
Love and cuddles
So apart from learning my husband is a really bad loser and unbelievably competitive what has the X-Box ever done for me? Well apart from the late night occasions where I’m woken by cries of ‘FUCK!! FUCK!! WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING WESTY?’ and the constant feeing that I’m listening into somebody elses phone conversation I have learned several things since that little black box entered my house.
The first is that it doesn’t matter that our TV has a split screen mode which would allow me to watch CSI whilst Teeps plays, it would be stupid and inconsiderate for me to ask my game addict husband to sacrifice even the smallest amount of the 32” inch screen. This means I have to REALLY want to watch something and has resulted in me NOT watching Big Brother, X factor, I’m a Celebrity or any other reality TV which possibly won’t be repeated should I miss an episode. So the Xbox has cured me of reality TV.
The second thing I have learnt since the 360 appeared under our telly is that Microsoft are clever bastards. Not only do they come up with games people feel or think they want but Xbox live means that if you want to socialise with your virtual mates then you not only WANT to buy the latest games but you HAVE to buy them or risk being a social pariah.
I have also learned NEVER TALK TO SOMEONE WEARING A HEADSET! The reason is simply because he’s not listening. He is either concentrating on killing people, coming up with some witty insult like "i'd rather eat my own face than play with you again" or is more interested in what his team is up to.
Lastly for this blog I have learned that my husband tells stupid lies like ‘I live in Texas’ and he can’t do any accent other than a Bolton one. In fact I don’t like him very much when he plays. He’s a bad bad man. (she doesn't mean that...she loves me...loves me lots! - tps)
These are all observations from watching my other half over the top of my ds. In my next offering I will be writing about tea-break and toilet etiquette as observed by the non-gamer.
Love and cuddles
Mrs Teeps
1 comments:
Reading your blog was like someone reading my mind.
Post a Comment